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Alan Fobbs

Some people have underestimated Alan Fobbs. Others have not. According to Meryl Streep, Ernest Hemingway once remarked to F. Scott Fitzgerald, "I owe my syntactic soul to those perfect sentences in Alan Fobbs' prose. I've spent my whole life trying to write like that." Gertrude Stein is said to have remarked after reading some of Fobbs' more pithy remarks, "I think I am think thinking think thinking I am for thinking is is is is is." Whatever.
In any case, here are some important things Fobbs said before he died:

  1. "No one walks a straight line."
  2. "If I saw you and you saw me, it was probably physics."
  3. "Every year, more and more people grow old."
  4. "Beware of tornadoes that come from disturbances of the air."
  5. "Some things float."
  6. "Some things just float."
  7. "Some things might just float."
  8. "If you look at a bird, it may not see you."
  9. "You can tell a lot by what you think."
  10. "You seldom see the inside of a tree."
  11. "People seldom consider the mayonnaise."
  12. "Everyone walks on the right side of the road."
  13. "You should open a dinner roll before eating it."
  14. "Most people have to think about things."
  15. "Nothing should be on your front steps."
  16. "Try to walk with your feet close to the ground."
  17. "Try not to ignore what's on the bottom of your shoe."
  18. "You can put a stone in your mouth but not a rock."
  19. "Ankles are as important as knees."
  20. "One cannot talk and inhale at the same time."
  21. "No one pauses to think; everyone pauses to eat."
  22. "You always have to start somewhere."
  23. "Few have listened to the mayonnaise."
  24. "It's good to inhale at the end of the day."
  25. "You should try to live your own life unless you can fit in someone else's."
  26. "Knees are as important as wrists."
  27. "Wrists are as important as necks."
  28. "You can tell a lot by looking at barns."
  29. "It's good to walk with your shoes close to the ground."
  30. "It's good to walk with your socks close to your shoes."
  31. "You can't carry many bricks in a box."
  32. "Most people cannot talk in a vacuum."
  33. "You can learn a lot by watching watermelons."
  34. "If my head was bigger, I'd still like watermelon and hate prickly pear jelly."
  35. "You can listen to your shoe."
  36. "You can stick your finger up your nose."
  37. "On a bus, it's better to know where you're going than where Uncle Ben put the mustard."
  38. "If you can listen to your shoe, you can listen to your mitten."
  39. "Mittens are important."


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