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2. Try to use strong verbs.
- Keep sentences medium-sized unless you need to make long sentences or short sentences.
- Put the point you're emphasizing first.
- Avoid wasteful openings like "There are . . ."; "It is . . . that . . ."; "What is important is . . . "; "An example is when . . ."; "There is a . . . that . . ."; "That he was concerned was . . . ."
[As writers get better, as they strive to sound more academic and/or abstract, they discover nouns. After they discover these nouns, their prose suffers unless they find ways to give up those nouns.]
- Watch out for be-verbs replacing strong verbs.
- Watch out for be-verbs plus nominalizations (nouns that could be verbs)
- The decision was . . . -----> Jones decided to . . .
- . . . in conformity -----> . . . conforms to . . .
- draws a conclusion -----> concludes that . . .
- Watch out for passives that create weak or unclear subjects. Be especially concerned with passives that have a strong "by" built in:
- The records were provided ---->John Smrogg provided the records.
- It can be assumed ----> [Someone] can assume . . .
- Watch out for abstract or inanimate subjects when you can provide animate ones--especially general subjects like "nature" or "society."
- Write in first person; avoid "one" or "the author" or "people" (especially if you know who they are.):
- The poem convinces us that . . . ----> Keats convinces us that . . [Some people rightly point out that Keats never really convinces us of anything--but then poems don't, either.]
- The reliability of Jones was his strength ---> Jones was influential because he was reliable.
- The corporation had lost contact with its employees---> The board of directors had lost contact with their employees
- Especially watch out for clutter that comes from prepositions (and prepositions with nominalizations)
- Cluttered: "In many of these situations, the goals of the providers of the information can run directly opposite to those of the users."
[Somewhat less cluttered: "Often, those who provide information have different goals from those who use that information."]
And watch out for useless modifiers like "very," "surely," "truly," "really." [Well, watch out for all your extra modifiers. In fact, adjectives and adverbs don't necessarily make things better, more clear, or more enjoyable to read. And be careful with negatives.
- "His view was not unreasonable."- -> "His view was reasonable."
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